The Confidence Issue

There are things about myself that I would change in an instant if I could. Of course there are, I’m a human being.

Don’t get me wrong, I love my basic looks, my basic style, and my quirky sense of humor. However, if I could tweak things a bit here and there, I would in a heartbeat. But the thing that I would change the most is my confidence level. I have incredibly low confidence and sometimes I fear success. Success comes on the heels of putting yourself out there and trying, like, in front of people. This is one of the only things I fear…well, that and needles.

Yes, I have health issues, but who doesn’t? Yes, I am considered obese, but I can exercise. Yes, I have hair so thick that I get headaches, glasses so thick that people crack bottle jokes, and feet so low and wide that shoes are difficult to find…but all that can be taken care of with just a little work. Confidence now, confidence is a lifelong battle. The saddest part about this low confidence? I know I’m awesome. I am a GREAT mother, a FABULOUS crochet-er, and an AMAZING author, among other things…but I just don’t think I want to put myself out there enough so that someone can tell me otherwise.

You see, I was told a long time ago by someone in my family that there is ALWAYS someone better than you at anything you do. Are you world renowned for your amazing talent at toe tatting? Well guess what, there’s a five year old in Jamaica that can out toe tat you on any given day…they just haven’t been discovered yet. With that in mind, I have spent my life hiding out, trying to convince myself that I’m the kid in Jamaica and not the sad sack who thinks they rule the world. It’s a way of life anyway.  

Here is something else to remember though, No one is perfect, everyone has to learn to be the best THEY can be, and flaws are what make a person interesting. So here is to our flaws, I wouldn’t change a thing about you! Have a Blessed DAY!

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2 thoughts on “The Confidence Issue

  1. I am right there with you on this one. I feel that fear daily although we bring it on ourselves. I have never felt like I was the best at any one thing though, I feel like I do okay with several things but…..not the best at anything. We need to learn it is okay to enjoy things without being the best at it.

    • I agree. Although this is, for me at least, really more of an issue of knowing that I’m good. There is always someone better, but I’m pretty darn good too.

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