Catawampus – A Short Story

In just a few short minutes my life went from neat and orderly to a catawampus mess…all because of an actual cat.

Not just any old regular cat though. NO! This ferocious feline was a tiny, terrifying tyrant. Oh sure, she looked sweet and adorable at the shelter with her big greenish gold eyes looking so innocent and her soft fur so well coiffed. As soon as I came into view of her kennel the little actress started up, mewling and purring and looking deep into my soul….of course I took her home immediately!

At first she snuggled her soft, warm body into the crook of my arm and accompanied through a Netflix bender. I guess she got bored with the movie after I fell asleep though because I woke up to see her nibbling on my leftover burrito. Within seconds something changed though and suddenly there was a MONSTER destroying my pillows.

My once soft and sweet siamese must have been a secret Gremlin! Sharp nails and teeth tore at everything in sight. Fluff and saw dust covered what used to be my seating area, cords were quickly clipped, torn, and frayed, and my shelf of ceramic Care Bears was teetering dangerously in no time.

I tried to stop the madness, I really did, but as soon as I moved, she turned glowing eyes in my direction and hissed. There’s not way I’m getting my security deposit back now!

I guess that’s what I get for naming her Gizmo. Next time I think I’ll get a nice big dog instead!

Batting Around 2-Cat’s Perspective

My best friend is a big fluffy ball. Every day I wake him up with a POUNCE and he rolls from the top of a pile of his siblings to come play with me. WE HAVE SO MUCH FUN!

Sometimes he gets so excited that his ends start to unravel and he becomes a long trail of fuzzy strings. When that happens my mom picks him up, rolls him up, and sends us both for naps. I’m not supposed to get him all riled up, but it is so exciting to run around together that I sometimes forget that part.

He hasn’t been looking too great lately though; I think he might be sick. His fluff has started to frizz and he snags and flops now. I’m afraid he may not be with me much longer, Mommy took him off of the pile today and put him in the other room.

What’s this?? It looks like my friend but he’s not a ball anymore. Mommy made him into a toy for me…AND HE SQUEAKS!!! I don’t have to sneak him off a pile anymore either, Mommy says he can live with me all the time now!

(my actual creepy kitty, making friends with houseshoes)

 

 

 

Batting Around

I missed Short Story Sunday yesterday due to an extreme lack of story and extra not-feeling-good in both my daughter and I. We still don’t feel very well, but I did get a story started last night so I am plunging right ahead with it!

Batting Around

The world begins to roll on past me, pricks of pain shredding my skin. This dizzy insanity serves to once again remind me that I am made for a more sedentary lifestyle. This is not what I am meant for, this terrifying spin that leaves me spread thin and tangled on the floor. And does anyone ever ask if I’m ok? NO! They just roll me back up and throw me on top of the basket. Then it’s a perfunctory “bad kitty” and a tap on the nose for my persecutor. As if that will stop him from leaping over my brethren and tearing me apart as soon as the mistress has turned her back again.

I know I’m complaining about something that cannot be changed immediately, but several of my kin have been saved already. I watch them as the mistress chooses their bright hues and weaves them into her life…but I am just a muddy green and there is no need for my colors in her work, so I am left on the top of the stack, attacked daily by that mottled beast.

Wait! She has chosen me and loops my fragile body around her hook. She is making me into something special! I am a butterfly slowly emerging from my cocoon! What is this?? A CAT TOY?? NO! This can’t be right! PLEASE DON’T THROW ME BACK, I WAS GOOD YARN ONCE! A cat toy…I can’t believe my life.

(a beautiful hand spun green via:http://www.etsy.com/listing/120852730/sale-handspun-yarn-spring-awakening)

Night

It is after midnight. I’ve been fighting with my daughter for hours, unable to lay her in the crib (or even readjust my position on the couch) without those big eyes immediately popping open and staring at me reproachfully. When I eventually bit the bullet and laid her down anyway, she cried and said ‘Mommy’ in that helpless little voice, so that I had to stand next to her bed and allow her to stare at me. She didn’t want me to rub her back or to sing (I know why…there is a reason I played in the band instead of choir). Finally, I walked out to get a drink, ‘Be quiet, I’ll be back soon.” Not soon enough, but it was a start. In the end, I just stayed out and ‘shhed’ from the next room.

The house is silent now, even the cat has given up her races for the night. The kid might actually be asleep. It is possible that she drifted off despite her best efforts, and maybe we’ll get to sleep in tomorrow. It is also possible, and much more probable, that she is laying silently in her bed, just waiting for a half thought of sigh of relief, or the tiniest inaudible squeak of a box spring to tell her that I am in my own bed and, therefore, must need to get up and get her again.

                                                                         

(cuter than my actual cat..who is kind of scary)